There was scant internet available for much of the remaining stretch of the Mississippi River or as we made out way onto the Tombigbee River, so many of the memories we created are going to be a blur. I'll try to capture the highlights here.
We left Hoppie's Marina as early as the Coffeeville Dam said they didn't have a back-up of barges waiting. Other than Dresden locks where we had to overnight, we have really been lucky with Dams as far as I can remember. We haven't had to wait much at all, despite war stories from other boaters of four to six hour waits at some locks. The river really looked a lot alike as we traveled down, and there wasn't much that was remarkable. We had a couple of anchorage nights before Paducah- nothing spectacular, but we always make the most of the "ground time" we have! The Handsome Captain is always good for a fire, a steady hand as the Littles climb fallen trees of dubious stability, and adult beverages to soften the edges of another day on that "treacherous" water.
We arrived in Paducah earlier than we thought we would, and as we talked to the dock hands, we decided to "go for it" and wind around the Ohio River to the Barkley Lake Dam instead of a straighter route on the Tennessee River where we would have to wait 8 hours at the Kentucky Dam... No thank you! The result was the same - pretty much everyone ended up at Green Turtle Bay Marina - and we got there just as the sun was going down - talked in on radio by a nice guy who was willing to stay late for us (and who also was originally from Michigan...small world!).
A HEATED POOL! AND SO MUCH ROOM FOR ACTIVITIES!!! We felt like we had been on the boat without physical exercise for so long. It felt great to warm up our toes and to stretch out and move around!! Ah...the small pleasures in life. Needless to say, we stayed here for a couple of nights. It was still cold, but that pool! I did treat myself to a pedicure since it was right.there.on.sight. Who wouldn't? You know you're in the South when the women do not leave the house without full makeup or their hair done. "The higher the hair, the closer to Jesus!". The woman who gave me my pedicure was adorable and quite typically Southern - a survivor for sure. A divorced mom of two children, she didn't take any guff. Our conversation took as many twists and turns as the river and I found myself fooled by the stereotype of her accent for she was a very bright woman. She did make me laugh however when she informed me that if I wanted to learn how to apply makeup (which she had on in spades), all I had to do was look for Drag Queen videos on YouTube. Hm...Yep. I get it now.
Friends ask us where we are, and sometimes it's hard to answer. For one thing, the river really doesn't offer a lot of variety in scenery. For instance, I don't know why I took this picture, but I have a LOT that look just like it. Another reason why it's difficult to give a good answer as to where we talk in Mile Markers now - almost like those from New Jersey ask what exit on the Turnpike you're from - we set our stops based on what Mile Marker on the River they can be found at. I kept getting confused as to the actual state we were in, but looking at the River, one side is Missouri the other is Illinois and then it becomes one side Missouri (how big is that state anyway?) and the other side Kentucky. So if you're calling me and I can't tell you where I am, be patient. Or put a tracking device on me next time. Geography has never been my strong-suit.
We left Green Turtle Bay...Wait. Let me just tell you that I've forgotten at this point how many locks we have gone through, and how many more are staring us down, but let's just say it's a LOT. Seems like on travel days when I'm trying to get the kids settled down below, there's a lock about every hour or so. So, let's just say it's a crap-ton and leave it at that, ok? Thanks. Handsome Captain who is also very smart decided that although he liked looking at me up on the bow of the boat, it was actually safer and just as effective if we tied off from the stern. Oh, if I didn't love him tons before, I certainly loved him then! Standing on the back of the boat, and being able to cuddle with the dogs or the kids or even (gasp!) sneak a kiss was absolute heaven compared to the cold wet perch on the bow.
So, we left GTB and headed south on the Tenn-Tom Waterway. Recall that we are using a "cruising guide" and one that we don't particularly love as the writer is particularly scattered (pot calling the kettle black?) and the editing is horrid. Well....The book said that Birdsong Marina Resort was the place to anchor that night, the only freshwater pearl farm in the US. So we thought we had to go. Did we even *know* that we had traipsed through the "Trail of Tears National Forest" miles ago? Nope. But we were headed to Birdsong Marina for darned sure. I need a name for this cruising guide...."Book of BS" "Guide to Gotchas" or "Map of Misery" are rolling off my tongue. Nah, it's not *that* bad, but "a mile off the river in a well-marked channel" was *not* accurate. Crazy Bob, the owner of Biirdsong had me on the phone (he didn't radio for some reason) and I'm standing next to the love of my life as he is literally spitting bullets and that crease between his brows was deeper than the Grand Canyon. Two-plus twisting miles of shallow water (at some places only 6' deep while we, ourselves are 5' into the water!).
Traverse City Michigan is all about the traffic circles lately, even when they aren't even large enough to make sense. There was one point in this twisted journey to Birdsong that we had to traffic circle around a small "island" (read: pile of mud that was sticking out of the water). The day was such that the sun is directly in our eyes and Bob is "old man yelling" in my ear "Now Janna, do you see that duck blind off to your right? ". No, Bob, I really can't see anything at the moment, and are we even *close* to your marina?? Many of you have been in this position - an unhappy spouse is at your side, you are on the phone trying to listen to an old guy who also keeps yelling at his office-girl (I use such inappropriate labels because we are in the South now, remember?) and you feel stuck. You feel guilt for being in this position. HEY! This was NOT my idea. I've said it - and now I feel better. I'd like to report that it was all worth it in the end, but not really. Oh, it was very interesting to hear about the rusted rotted-out half-sunk river boat that we tied next to, and we did get water (until it all froze again) and electricity, and free laundry.
Once we were ensconced and the dogs and children had gotten their wiggles out, we decided that crazy Bob was surely going to yell at or fire his office girl if we didn't take the tour of their Pearl Museum, so we obliged. We learned the history of the pearl farm (mussels, not oysters) and how they put implants of shells into the mussels to create pearls. Really, it was very interesting. We did end up buying a few items from the gift shop, how could you not? A girl does love pearls after all.
We sort of wanted to take our purchases back to the store, however, when we were headed out from Birdsong in their "well marked channel" (said with sarcasm and air-quotes) and our boat lurched about two feet out of the water having hit some submerged item of unusual size (SSUS's? anyone for a Princess Bride reference?) We had clunked a couple of items down the Mississippi up to this point (and I'd go up and say "what was that?" and Handsome Captain would say "I dunno, I thought you guys dropped something down below" and I'd say "Nope, we must've hit something". Kind of silly of me. Of course we hit something. Why do I bother going up to ask what it was?) But this time, we were both at the helm (now doesn't that sound official). So we looked at each other, said a few words that I can't publish followed by, "What do we do?". Brilliant Captain put the boat in neutral as we scanned the waters looking for what it might have been, but we saw nothing. Not even the spooky body that I keep half-expecting to find because I've watched too many episodes of NCIS. Still brilliant, our Captain then put the boat in reverse for a little in case something was wedged into the props (which it wasn't) and then tested the boat that it would move forward (which it did, but with a new little shimmy-shake at higher speeds). We called Crazy Bob to let him know that there was something lurking in the channel, but he didn't want to hear it. He was really defensive whereas we were just giving him a heads up in case he wanted to go look for it or something? Apparently, it's part of river life, and it was probably just a partially submerged (waterlogged) log, and it would undoubtedly travel and grace someone else with it's presence on another day/another prop. 😩
We left Hoppie's Marina as early as the Coffeeville Dam said they didn't have a back-up of barges waiting. Other than Dresden locks where we had to overnight, we have really been lucky with Dams as far as I can remember. We haven't had to wait much at all, despite war stories from other boaters of four to six hour waits at some locks. The river really looked a lot alike as we traveled down, and there wasn't much that was remarkable. We had a couple of anchorage nights before Paducah- nothing spectacular, but we always make the most of the "ground time" we have! The Handsome Captain is always good for a fire, a steady hand as the Littles climb fallen trees of dubious stability, and adult beverages to soften the edges of another day on that "treacherous" water.
We arrived in Paducah earlier than we thought we would, and as we talked to the dock hands, we decided to "go for it" and wind around the Ohio River to the Barkley Lake Dam instead of a straighter route on the Tennessee River where we would have to wait 8 hours at the Kentucky Dam... No thank you! The result was the same - pretty much everyone ended up at Green Turtle Bay Marina - and we got there just as the sun was going down - talked in on radio by a nice guy who was willing to stay late for us (and who also was originally from Michigan...small world!).
Friends ask us where we are, and sometimes it's hard to answer. For one thing, the river really doesn't offer a lot of variety in scenery. For instance, I don't know why I took this picture, but I have a LOT that look just like it. Another reason why it's difficult to give a good answer as to where we talk in Mile Markers now - almost like those from New Jersey ask what exit on the Turnpike you're from - we set our stops based on what Mile Marker on the River they can be found at. I kept getting confused as to the actual state we were in, but looking at the River, one side is Missouri the other is Illinois and then it becomes one side Missouri (how big is that state anyway?) and the other side Kentucky. So if you're calling me and I can't tell you where I am, be patient. Or put a tracking device on me next time. Geography has never been my strong-suit. |
| Random |
So, we left GTB and headed south on the Tenn-Tom Waterway. Recall that we are using a "cruising guide" and one that we don't particularly love as the writer is particularly scattered (pot calling the kettle black?) and the editing is horrid. Well....The book said that Birdsong Marina Resort was the place to anchor that night, the only freshwater pearl farm in the US. So we thought we had to go. Did we even *know* that we had traipsed through the "Trail of Tears National Forest" miles ago? Nope. But we were headed to Birdsong Marina for darned sure. I need a name for this cruising guide...."Book of BS" "Guide to Gotchas" or "Map of Misery" are rolling off my tongue. Nah, it's not *that* bad, but "a mile off the river in a well-marked channel" was *not* accurate. Crazy Bob, the owner of Biirdsong had me on the phone (he didn't radio for some reason) and I'm standing next to the love of my life as he is literally spitting bullets and that crease between his brows was deeper than the Grand Canyon. Two-plus twisting miles of shallow water (at some places only 6' deep while we, ourselves are 5' into the water!).
Traverse City Michigan is all about the traffic circles lately, even when they aren't even large enough to make sense. There was one point in this twisted journey to Birdsong that we had to traffic circle around a small "island" (read: pile of mud that was sticking out of the water). The day was such that the sun is directly in our eyes and Bob is "old man yelling" in my ear "Now Janna, do you see that duck blind off to your right? ". No, Bob, I really can't see anything at the moment, and are we even *close* to your marina?? Many of you have been in this position - an unhappy spouse is at your side, you are on the phone trying to listen to an old guy who also keeps yelling at his office-girl (I use such inappropriate labels because we are in the South now, remember?) and you feel stuck. You feel guilt for being in this position. HEY! This was NOT my idea. I've said it - and now I feel better. I'd like to report that it was all worth it in the end, but not really. Oh, it was very interesting to hear about the rusted rotted-out half-sunk river boat that we tied next to, and we did get water (until it all froze again) and electricity, and free laundry.
Once we were ensconced and the dogs and children had gotten their wiggles out, we decided that crazy Bob was surely going to yell at or fire his office girl if we didn't take the tour of their Pearl Museum, so we obliged. We learned the history of the pearl farm (mussels, not oysters) and how they put implants of shells into the mussels to create pearls. Really, it was very interesting. We did end up buying a few items from the gift shop, how could you not? A girl does love pearls after all.
We sort of wanted to take our purchases back to the store, however, when we were headed out from Birdsong in their "well marked channel" (said with sarcasm and air-quotes) and our boat lurched about two feet out of the water having hit some submerged item of unusual size (SSUS's? anyone for a Princess Bride reference?) We had clunked a couple of items down the Mississippi up to this point (and I'd go up and say "what was that?" and Handsome Captain would say "I dunno, I thought you guys dropped something down below" and I'd say "Nope, we must've hit something". Kind of silly of me. Of course we hit something. Why do I bother going up to ask what it was?) But this time, we were both at the helm (now doesn't that sound official). So we looked at each other, said a few words that I can't publish followed by, "What do we do?". Brilliant Captain put the boat in neutral as we scanned the waters looking for what it might have been, but we saw nothing. Not even the spooky body that I keep half-expecting to find because I've watched too many episodes of NCIS. Still brilliant, our Captain then put the boat in reverse for a little in case something was wedged into the props (which it wasn't) and then tested the boat that it would move forward (which it did, but with a new little shimmy-shake at higher speeds). We called Crazy Bob to let him know that there was something lurking in the channel, but he didn't want to hear it. He was really defensive whereas we were just giving him a heads up in case he wanted to go look for it or something? Apparently, it's part of river life, and it was probably just a partially submerged (waterlogged) log, and it would undoubtedly travel and grace someone else with it's presence on another day/another prop. 😩
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